We have all fell victim to the minimal efforts of our partners. I am pretty sure it happens in every household…just no one talks about it. Lord knows I will….
I have bought and worn sexy lingerie, lit candles, bought warming massage lotions and pretty much anything else to creative a vibe in the house. I got a paddle at one sexy party and accidentally bought a strap on at another. I am dead serious about the accidental purchase…and it just dawned on me that I never wrote about that one. I need to do that…
Anyway. I talk sexy at bars, list all the fun things that are going down in the red room tonight and once or twice left the establishment with my panties in my pocket.
I am doing everything within my power to keep the spice in our lives and maintain the level of sexiness that we had when we were dating.
Hubz has two moves.
One he will pull away from a long hug or kiss and nod his head back towards the bedroom. He might as well grunt and drag me back there. Fucking cave man! Like the thought of sex renders him mute.
The second move he has is, right after I announce I am going to hit the rain locker….he wonders if I would like him to make me more dirty before my shower. What the hell does that even mean? Is he going to become a monkey and start flinging his poop at me? Does he want to do it down by the dumpster? Am I only allowed to use the shower at a certain level of uncleanliness?
Just once I would like him to prance around the house in something skimpy. I know the rest of you don’t want to see this…but I do 😊 Light a candle, put on some music and turn off the tv. I getting pretty sick of the only effort being when he slides up next to me in bed….just before REM and whispers “hey….”
Get hey to suck your dick.