If you could be fluent in a language, what would it be?

When my husband and I were first dating, he told me that it would be extremely beneficial for me to learn Spanish. OMG! Did no one speak English in TX? That wasn’t it at all he said. Then he explained, what we already knew; his mother didn’t like. Never mind that she had never met me…no one was good enough for her son! She was either going to talk shit in front of me in English or Spanish…..and it would be helpful to know both in case I needed to defend myself. JESUS! Am I dating a member of the mob? Nice mom dude :/

My future mother in law loved me immediately. We hit it off and there wasn’t a shitty comment made. In fact, she told me ALL about her nasty divorce 25 years ago; and hubz said that is a sign of trust. Like when a cat exposes their belly.

Fast forward to Christmas 2012. Hubz and I went to TX for the holidays and family was in and out visiting all day. It was great to meet so many members of my new extended family. As we sat around the kitchen island, it was mostly a Spanish conversation. Being I took 4 months of it in my Freshman year, I thought I was keeping up pretty good. I caught trabaja and manana….so someone had to work tomorrow. I caught the names of who they were talking about….wished I could have understood the gossip. Then I caught blanco. OH HELL NO! That bitch just called me WHITE. Why is that an issue? Why would someone say that? Why would they say that right in front of me?

I excused myself and made a beeline for our room. I needed Google Translate for a witty comeback. Hubz came in and wondered why I was so upset. I told him about my hurt feelings and she started to laugh. Turns out, his great aunt was telling him that he looked a lot lighter than the last time he saw him.
Dear Santa,
I need Rosetta Stone

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