Jeff Foxworthy has a shtick where he claimed should identify yourself as less than intelligent, by displaying a sign. If you wondered if you needed a sign, he provided several examples of behavior worthy of being deemed an idiot. I need something like that; only I want to offer a HIGH 5…. across the face…with a chair. A little violent…. but I assure you ; it has come to that.
I sent an email that read “If you do not pick up your documents by Friday 1/27, I will drop them in the mail for delivery.”
2/17 I received a reply. “I got a copy of my documents in the mail. Do you still have a copy for me to pick up?”
When asked what size of a hoodie to order, I was told small. After it is tried on, I am asked for an extra small because his was too big. Fine…. your new….I get it. First week on the job; how are you supposed to know what size you are? The next round of SWAG was a jacket.
Captain mini britches wondered if he could swap his for an extra small…
There have been requests for Benadryl, Theraflu and a variety of tampons. We work about a half a block from 2 grocery and 1 drug store. Go get it yourself or get on line. I know you all have Amazon Prime…make it rain yourself.
HIGH 5 to each of you!
Company wide email gets sent on relaxation day. This is the verbiage of an actual email:
“The sign up is located upstairs.
If you would like to see what is available, please go upstairs and look.
If you want to sign up, please go upstairs and sign up.
If you would like to cancel your time, please go upstairs and take your name off the list.”
Here are some of the actual responses:
“I’ll take the 9:40 please if still open”
“Can I sign up for the 10a slot?”
“Can you remind me what time I signed up for?”
“Where is meditation?”
HIGH 5’S for everyone…and I am taking your time slot!