I have a sneaking suspicion that it was not Mark Zuckerberg but aliens who created Face Book. It was not created for people to connect, but rather for the weakest ones to be easily identified. This is going to help them distinguish between those welcome aboard the mother ship and those who they would need to end the blood line before it spreads to the new planet. Here are a few who haven’t made the VIP list for transport…
Those who depend on FB for details and information – I recently joined a community page that Hubz had referenced a few times. At first, I could understand the usefulness of this page/group. There were posts about overturned trucks on heavily traveled roads, cautions about outages and community events. Today it was chalked full of requests to hand over the contents of your rolodex. Post: Looking for recommendations for a roofer. Translation: The only effort I am going to give this project is to log onto Face Book. Post: Posting for a friend – looking for a doctor familiar with Candida. Translation: Dude…your friend has a yeast infection…EW! Post: looking to visit WhoVille. Should we stay here or there? Translation: I cannot read a map. OMG People!!
Those who require FB translation or further explanation – Have you ever posted a thought and had a “friend” commented with a ? ? What do you mean by ? Is that the only key that works on your keyboard? Is that the last key you hit before you stroked out? Do you need help??
I posted a picture to show the view I was expecting to see in a few days:
Friend: Where are you?
Friend: Where is that view?
Friend: Why are you there?
Me: I am not. I am home now bit will be there in a few days.
OMG…do you just want to call me?
Those who are so miserable in their lives they show a completely different one online – You know who they are. Beautiful children dressed perfectly, gorgeous view from the dream job, lavish romantic dinners and sights with the love of their live….complete with 800 glowing hash tags. Truth be told she is cheating, the kids didn’t pass to the next grade and the they are one credit card statement from bankruptcy.
There are more. So so so many more. These are just the ones who pissed me off the most today.